Bag Lady

Growing up, my family always referred to me as the "bag lady."  I always, always had a bad full of things with me.  When I got old enough to start carrying a pocket book, all bets were off.  I carry my life in my purse...almost literally.  Throughout the years I have assembled a host of items that will get me out of a minor scrape, or possibly save my life.  Haha! 
After seeing another blog do this, I decided to start a weekly guest post called "What's in your pocketbook?"  I've already asked a couple of brave women if they would let us peek into their lives via their possibly cluttered or possibly organized pocketbook.  I figured if I was going to ask other girls to expose the contents of their sacred bags, I should go first.  Please note: I have not edited the contents.  (Ok with exception to the half eaten bag of pistachios, and a lot of Wal-Mart receipts.) 
Soooo, wanna see what I carry in my everday pocket book?
 

A list of items, starting from the top left:
1.  Half eaten bag of gummi worms - I figured this was a good place to start.  I love me some gummi worms.  Don't worry, they have a clip that has them closed up.
2.  Three different packs of gum
3.  An unopened can of Altoids I got for Christmas.
4.  A really really really squished breakfast bar - Totally forgot this was in there

Now going to the bottom left:
5.  Coupon holder - a little book with a snap that keeps my coupons from flying all around my purse.
6.  Kindle - before my awesome parents got me this, I had anywhere from 1 to 3 books in my purse at one time.  This way, I can carry as many books as I want, without all the weight.  And allows me to nurture my obsession with pristine book covers.  It's awesome! 
7.  iPod - gotta keep my tunes with me.  But notice I don't have headphones to listen to said tunes?
8.  Buttons - a person at my old job gave me these buttons, and over 6 months later they are still in my purse, threatening to stab me each time I stick my hand in my purse.  Somehow, they have never succeeded.
9.  Pink wallet - somehow one of the smallest things in my purse is the most important?
10.  Key - This key actually goes to a file cabinet.  My car keys should be in this group, but they're hanging by my door.
12.  Planner and pens - self explanatory.  Should be noted, I have never used this planner.   

Back to the top row.  Little note: all of these little items go inside a smaller bag that goes inside of the bigger bag.  They're like Chinese nesting dolls...Closer picture below:

12.  Comb - You know, for combing?13.  Medicine - from Ibuprofen, to Neosporin, to Orajel (had a toothache once and now I always carry this with me.  That cute little change purse with the flower on it is full of medicine too.  :)
14.  Lipstick, lip gloss, lip balm - about 3 of each?  Kinda overkill, and no, I don't wear them all at the same time.
15.  Hair brush - You know, for brushing? 
16.  Lint roller - Got this from a coworker 2 Christmases ago.  Awesome gift; no longer linty!!
17.  Lotion - I normally hate lotion, but this Avon kind my mom got me isn't bad.
18.  Spare contacts - I'm blind without them, so I always have spares.
19.  Floss - On top of the contact box.  For when I grab corn on the cob to go?
20.  Pocket knife - To saw my arm of if need be.  A la Aron Ralston (please note, I could not remember this guy's name so I typed into Google "guy who sawed..." and "his arm off" popped up.  You get me Google, you get me.)
21.  Fingernail clippers - Of all of the items in my bag, I get asked for this item the most.  Particularly by my brother in law.  Guess what he got for Christmas... 
22.  Fingernail files - 2 of them
23.  A string of safety pins - Can barely see them, but there are about 6 of them.  I have saved many a woman in distress with these friends.
24.  Sewing kits - To stitch up a wound...or, you know, a button.

Going from the right corner in:
25.  Clear fingernail polish - For a little extra somethin on my claws or to stop a run in the hose.
26.  Deodorant - to smell fresh as a daisy!
27.  Hair rubber bands, clips, and bobby pins - to tame my mane
28.  Round mirror - to admire myself. Hah!
29.  Starbucks napkins - You may think this is weird, but these napkins are the best for blotting your face.  Don't believe me, try 'em!
30.  Earrings
31.  Cellphone! - for texting.  Never for talking.  Never.

Oh and the purse!  Got it from my mother-in-law as a wedding gift.  It's the perfect size to hold all of my loot! 
Phew!  I have a lot of stuff.  If I had to estimate, I would say that my purse weighs about 10 pounds.  I have to juggle shoulders if I carry it for more than an hour. 

Well, hopefully I didn't bore you to death (especially if any guys are reading, though they probably stopped reading after the word "purse.")  I'm looking forward to my future purse guest posts!  Wanna share the contents of your purse?  Let me know!